Have You Been Listening with Your Eyes?

I found this on the recent book I read, Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom (P.59) and thought I’d share it with you here.

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A little girl came home from school with a drawing she’d made in class. She danced into the kitchen, where her mother was preparing dinner.

“Mom, guess what?”, she squealed, waving the drawing.

Her mother never looked up.

“What?”,  She said, tending to the pots.

“Guess what?” The child repeated, waving the drawing.

“What?” the mother said, tending to the plates.

“Mom, you’re not listening”

“Sweetie, yes I am”

“Mom”, the child said. “You’re not listening with your eyes”.

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Don’t we hate it when we talk to someone and his/her eyes are not looking at us? We hate it because makes us feel ignored and less valuable.

Sadly, there are times when our kids are talking to us and our eyes are so focus on the Blackberry screen instead of on their sparkling innocent eyes :(. Isn’t it ironic that as mother we always say proudly that kids are our number one priority, yet on day to day basis, we always seem to multitask the most important people in our life with the not so important things, like reading time line on our Twitter or replying someone’s BBM :(

So yes, that’s just a friendly reminder *sort of a note to (MY) self* that to really listen to our children, we have to put aside whatever we’re doing at the moment, squat to their  eye level and look them in the eyes. Listening is different than hearing. Hearing is something that just happens, but listening requires more effort. Listening demands concentration so we can process the words and comprehend what’s exactly they are saying and understand their feelings. Listening leads to learning and helps us connect with them. And if we want them to listen to us, we better listen to them first.

May we  be a good listener to our children, the one who listens with her ears, eyes and heart :).

——–

Selamat Hari Raya Idul Adha untuk yang merayakan. Enjoy your time with your family :))

 


51 Comments - Write a Comment

  1. daleeeemmmm bgt :D..my daughter also said like that if i dont see her when she say something..”ummi, liat aku dooonk..ummi mah gitu..” anak juga punya hati punya perasaan dan dia pun punya ingin untuk menjadi penuh arti..klo udah gt, jangan malu buat minta maaf padanya, dan jelaskan padanya kenapa tadi tidak melihatnya, agar dia pun mengerti, tidak merasa diabaikan..

  2. ikut join ya moms.

    nice article. soalnya aku ngalamin sendiri.
    anakku 5 months, tp dia udh tau kl dicuekin gitu. kl aku lg breastfeeding dia sambil sibuk bbman, dia bisa nangis2 minta perhatiin. nangisnya ampe bercucuran air mata. hiks..kdg kita suka sibuk sendiri dgn dunia kita.

  3. Bener banget Han, jangankan anak, gw juga suka ngerasa dicuekin kalo lawan bicara lg gw ajak ngobrol tp sibuk pegang BB…hehehehe. Makanya kalo kita lagi ngumpul2 such as gath, gw memilih narok BB di tas, supaya ga tergoda utk pegang BB dan asik sendiri. Tapi trus kalo semuanya pada pegang BB dan asik sendiri, ya udah deh ikutan juga…hahahah.
    Based on that, sekarang gw jadi jarang pegang BB kalo lagi deket Tiara. Nanny gw cerita, anak yg dia asuh sebelumnya, tangan ibunya lepas dari BB kalo lagi mandi ajah. Lagi makan pun pegang BB. Kesian anak2nya dicuekin kata nanny gw. I don’t want to be that kind of mother :(
    TFS Hani :)

  4. iya..sama moms
    aku nyesel dulu pas masih ada kesempatan bisa nyusuin…malah sibuk deketin bb dan ipad biar ga bosen..
    pdhl kan harusnya aku liatin wajah anakku ya…
    skarang ini..anakku sdh umur 2thn 5bln.
    kalau aku pulang kerja dan ga langsung perhatiin dia karena sibuk liat hp..pasti direbut dan ditaruh jauh2..terus dia cerita panjang lebar…nyanyi…dll yg bikin mamanya sibuk dan ga inget sama hp nya lagi.. :D

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